Waiting

I was talking with someone recently and I had some thoughts about 'waiting' and what it means for me. I began by writing some notes to her, but then felt that I wanted to put it out into the world more, unfold myself...

Waiting is an important part of erotic desire. It is in the silences where we have time to go further and discover who we truly are. When I am waiting, I am with myself.

I also like to 'keep people waiting'. As I watch my partners wait, I see them. It is powerful and makes me feel excited. Sometimes they wait and watch me, maybe for a sign, or maybe because they enjoy the wait as I do, the anticipation...of the next feeling, the next expression, the first touch...

Sometimes, when I am waiting to touch myself, I feel my body's desire. I can sit and wait and feel my thoughts take me to another place, a place of visualization, a place of quiet sensation.

When I finally begin to caress myself, I stop and wait, allowing sensations to flow, feeling my desire; where will I go today? I listen to the sounds of the world around me, a car going by, some people talking in the yard next door. I am slow, and stop and wait for long moments, closing my eyes, being inside my dreams. My hands move over my skin, lightly at first. I feel my breathing quicken...and I wait...

I touch, gently. My thighs are warm. I slide my fingers over the skin, the fine hairs sending signals to my brain...and then, to my core. I am ready to open myself, all the while taking my time.

I imagine I am with a friend. She is watching me. I love to be watched and she loves watching. Her hands are on her knees and she smiles at me, with a look of encouragement. She is very patient; this I know. It is part of our way. I want her to wait, to look and to wait. I look at her knees, not wanting to look at her directly now. They open ever so slightly...just a little, a sign. She is making me wait, which is where I live...

I open. My flower is wet. I can feel it. My panties are damp. My hands move closer to my vulva. I feel my friend's eyes on me and it turns me on to no end. Not looking at her adds to the thrill. I enjoy being blindfolded, as she knows. Here, I trust myself to not look at her face. It requires discipline and rigor, things that I sometimes lack, but things that enhance my sexual expression immeasurably.

My fingers have reached the place where my thighs meet. I touch the edge of the cloth, running my fingers along it symmetrically. The blood flows, my mouth needs a lick and I feel my heart beating. I want to touch my mound, but I wait, just being in the present, letting the sensations rule me. I open my thighs some more. I watch my friend shift and open herself. She slides her skirt up slowly. I wait...more...she brings the cloth to her waist and I can see her panties. They are sheer. Red. My heart is beating faster...she opens more, then closes herself. I smile and I hear her swallow; it is that quiet.

My hands reach my blouse, a powder blue short-sleeve with small red buttons. I undo the top one...then the next one.

'Ohh...'. My friend breaks the silence with a whisper, encouraging me. I undo another button, and open my blouse a little, feeling the cool air on my neck and breasts. I count in my head; two buttons to go. We sit like this for a while and my hands return to my thighs. I open my legs more, showing myself slowly. I know that my friend can see the dampness now and hope that she is becoming more excited, as I am, with every passing minute. My index finger touches my vulva, and slides gently along its crack. I let out a deep breath, not realizing I had been holding it back.

My desire has become more acute with this last act, and I look up to my friend's face. Out eyes meet and I smile, part happiness, part incredible attraction, part unmitigated desire. She smiles back, and our eyes are locked while our smiles fall away to something more serious, more cerebral. I apply more pressure to my purse, touching my bud. A wave shoots up my spine, and suddenly my body is fully engaged in erotic sensation. I stare intently at my partner. My mouth opens slightly and I wet my dry lips with my tongue. Her mouth opens. I see her teeth. I might be a goner, but I wait a little more, looking at her, my eyes telling her to take over, even for just a little while.

Her hands open her thighs gracefully and she is wide now as she moves her fingers to her mound. My eyes return to the source of my stimulation and I can just make out her deliciousness. I watch as the index fingers of her hands draw along the wet lips and gently make first contact with her bud. My lover shifts... oh so quietly...and I watch, my own finger gliding along the ridge of my wet panties. I am in another zone now, completely enraptured. I hear her exhale, then draw a deep breath. She squeezes her clitoris hard for just a second and lets go, exhaling. She slowly pulls her skirt higher, letting me look for as long as I want...

I watch my friend as she brings the fingers of her right hand to her vulva, running them along her lips. I sense her head tilting to watch me watch her and I am instantly charged, my head spinning in an erotic mist, so focused on looking and her bold display. She moves her hand away and lets me see again, her beautiful flower behind the sheer red veil of her underwear. I watch...and wait...my head is pounding and my pelvis throbs. I want so much to have more contact, to touch her...to kiss her... to smell her hair, her neck, her armpits...every place, every fold, every opening. I want her to be my plaything...just for a little while. And, of course, I want to watch...and see more...

As if on queue, my lovely twin (as it feels like I am looking into a mirror) moves her panty aside, sliding the red cloth over to free herself. I swallow and stare. She is very wet, and her fingers rub her thick lips slowly, spreading the moisture over her entire mound. I am rapt; my eyes have stopped blinking, my fingers pressing on my own genitals through the damp cloth, almost automatically, a steady pulsing, the exquisite feelings taking over my body and my mind. We appear to be one sexual being, cause and effect, going back and forth with our eyes and our fingers. I am barely holding on, but she seems so poised, so controlled, guiding this interaction. This is fine with me, and she knows it. We have been to this place before, our teasing and waiting and looking a central part of our way.

She slowly slides her middle finger into her wetness, then out again. Her finger glistens in the fading afternoon light. In again, exquisitely slowly, taking her sweet time, knowing me so well, knowing what I like to see....then out again. Her lips are very open now and she moves her fingers away to let me look.

'I'll be your mirror, Rae.'

She knows I love the Velvet Underground and I smile at the reference, my gaze reluctantly moving away from her garden and up to her face. To my surprise she is looking right at me, with a broad grin and intoxicated eyes, half-closed in a veil of desire.

Really, I was her mirror...

And I know what all this means and I reach down, my eyes still glued to hers, and move my panty aside and slide my own finger into the deep. Her smile softens and her face is more serious now. I draw a breath, then slide out again, pausing there, waiting...my friend's eyes move downward and my heart pounds with the anticipation of her watching my activity. I stare as her eyes stop and rest at the tableau that I have mimicked when I allowed her to guide me. I look down as well, providing the requisite reflection and, once again, she enters herself, but with two fingers now. I do the same, forcing myself to not look at her beautiful face even more.

We watch and play, alternating between slow finger-fucking and clitoral massage. My bud feels like a ball bearing in oil, as Terry Sothern has described it so well. I am very turned on, and I know she is too, but she shows it less today. It's her controlling way sometimes...in charge, but not quite totally...leading me...anywhere, it seems...anywhere...

I continue my caresses, gazing at my friend while she administers pleasure to her vulva, so methodically slowly. I feel drunk with desire and seek more from her, but remain reluctant to ask, knowing that she wants to guide us just now. Jus as I am wondering this she moves her hand away, sits up and whispers...

'Why don't you come nearer?...have a closer view...?...I will take my panty off so you can see me more....would you enjoy that?...'

I swallow and nod, not wanting to break my silence.

She stands up and slips her panties off her hips and slides them down to her mid-thigh.

'Come nearer...it is what you want...'

I approach my friend. She continues in her soft whisper, which makes me crazy.

'Please take them down...all the way to the floor...feel their dampness...they are that way because of you...'

I hold the crotch of her panties. They are damp. I begin taking them down....to her knees...

'You can stop there. No more touching, please...only looking...'

I take my hand away and she closes her legs just enough to allow her undergarment to finish its journey to the floor. She steps out of them, then looks at me and smiles. I look up and smile back, waiting for her to move.

She sits back down on the ottoman and leans back, her shoulders and back resting on the matching chair. It is a dark paisley pattern. She is very beautiful against it, and again, I wait...and watch. I sit still near her feet.

She whispers again, 'Remember, my dove, no touching...only looking...'. I nod silently, but her eyes are closed and she is lying back, displaying herself for me. But also, for herself...

She opens her thighs and my eyes travel to her vulva, spread for me, her labia open and wet and the color of a dark rose. She thrusts her hips just a little, humping the air, inviting my view. I am beside myself, watching this little performance, trying to imagine the third act. I watch and wait. My lover opens up almost imperceptibly while I look at her. She thrusts up a little. Her eyes are closed and her hands are by her side.

'Kiss.'

Both she and I know what this means and her action proves it. Her hands frame her pelvis, slowly moving around, caressing her hips and upper thighs. I stare in wonder. She opens just a little more. It feels like she is getting wetter while I watch, but this could my mind taking me away.

I lean over and slide my middle finger into myself, my other fingers holding my lips and my palm firm against my bud. I bump myself in a slow rhythm, then rub. More bumping...more rubbing. My lover turns her head a little, acknowledging my movement. A small smile breaks up her face, then she returns to business. My face comes closer to her essence, and I am breathing on her stomach. She senses this, and spreads herself more, inviting me further.

'Kiss?'

She hikes her knees up opening herself wide. She is delicious looking and my mouth hovers over her mound, with its beautiful, full flower waiting for me. I look at her, savoring the view of her wet hairs framing her opening, traveling down to the crack of her bottom where they disappear in the darkness. Her cheeks are in view now, and her crack invites me. I want it all and feel confused about what I want more, and then...clarity...

'Kiss...'

I extend the tip of my tongue out and touch her swollen bud gently, then flick it softly. A long moan escapes from her, long held inside. I pull away and bringing my fingers to my mouth, taste myself, sucking and licking my hand. My friend's hands have moved to her breasts, cupping them and squeezing her nipples hard. She rocks her pelvis, waiting, wanting...

I slide my tongue into her dark flesh, open my mouth and cover her vulva. My hands cup her buttocks, and I hold her up and open to me like a large drinking vessel, while I tongue her slit. She is dripping wet and breathing hard. I fuck her with my tongue, in and out, my upper lip banging against her hard button in a steady rhythm. Suddenly her hands grab my head and she holds it, trying to bring my mouth deeper into her still. She holds me tight, while she reaches orgasm, bucking slowly at first, then harder. I am along for the ride, licking, fucking and sucking her generous cunt, drinking my fill. I hold her ass cheeks firmly while she comes in waves with me being held so close to her. It is as if she wants my entire being inside her.

She slows down and begins to unwind. I suck her, but she is so tender, she pushes my head away, laughing. I try and suck her more, lapping her soaked cunny and I laugh and raise myself up to see her face. She is looking at me already...smiling. I smile back, my mouth wet from her. I lick her off my lips, tasting her, and smile again, then move to kiss my beautiful friend who loves to wait.


Fin