My Life with Porn Today

My masturbation journey has reached the point where it has become a coping mechanism.

I've been experiencing a bit of a mid-life crisis lately, most of it related to my employment. I worked many years in an industry I hated, left my job for a new one, and hated the new one even more. A classic case of jumping from the frying pan and into the fire.

My jerk off habits have changed because of this. I used to take great pleasure in holding off from jerking off all week, just occasionally peeking at porn, and then over the weekend toke up at night and have hours long goon sessions 'til my cock exploded. It was such an earth-shattering experience every time it was the only thing that kept me going through the week.

Now with my most recent position I've been too stressed to use the same methodology. At work with all the pent up nervous energy I could hardly concentrate. I even jacked off at work one time, something I had only did once before many years ago.

To cope with the anxiety and stress, I've turned to jacking off everyday. After a morning shower I get in bed, fire up the laptop with Xhamster and jack off for a good 2-3 minutes to make myself cum hard and fast. The porn I watch now has become almost exclusively rough hardcore gangbangs. The more cocks "violating" a babe's pussy, asshole and mouth while she's being verbally degraded the more turned on I become.

When I procrastinate I turn to porn. When I have nervous or stressful thoughts enter my mind, porn is there. I used to chuckle at all the porn worship and addiction vids, but now they get me really horny. I've even turned to watching gooner hypno vids; the multiple captions and verbal brainwashing audio makes me extremely horny.

I don't think this is a phase that will be forever, but for now porn is a big part of my life, whether it is healthy or not.