| 2011-03-22 22:23:16 |
PASSWORD to my sisters computer
|
I agree with Anonymous reader 2011-03-09 19:40:08. Spelling isn't everything but helps the story flow better. Part 2 please. |
| 2011-03-22 23:06:52 |
My younger Cousin Amanada
|
Where is the Authoritarian, Blackmail, and Pregnant? Nice try but horrible results. |
| 2011-04-05 17:14:47 |
A Rainy Day_(1)
|
It's "hymen" not "hymeine" and it is close to the entrance of the vagina. A virgin is on the pill? Not likely. Overall it's a good story and I'm looking forward to the next one. |
| 2011-04-07 15:57:03 |
Me and Kayla
|
Not very likely that a virgin would be on the pill. Like the other comments, good story, more detail, and proof read. We want to taste, smell, and feel it. Use all your senses to describ things. |
| 2011-04-09 11:35:18 |
Kelli 1971
|
I loved it. Keep the pace. Everybody wants you to have them fuck right away. Most kids don't just jump into bed real fast. She'll be afraid and he'll be unsure. Write it your way. I am looking forward to a second and third part. |